Monday, May 30, 2016

And.... We're Back.

May has been a crazy roller coaster of a month. Now that it is coming to a close, life is settling back in to its normal wackiness.

Gelatos in Montreal during our mini-moon.

Best Guy is going back to work tomorrow, so I will once again be a semi stay-at-home pet mom. Which is a good thing and a bad thing. Toby likes the quiet so being here with one of us is his secondary preferred state. His primary is both of us spending all day every day feeding him and scratching his tum-tum.

Rolling around in the grass is da bomb giggity.

My car, after spending the better part of two weeks in our garage not moving has decided to lock the rear brakes (or emergency brake, we're not sure) so I cannot use it. Tomorrow will be a day of towing and of cringing when I hear how much it's going to take to get it moving again.

I am - finally - ready to start work again in earnest. Taking a month off has been a breather I didn't know how desperately I needed until within the last day or so. I have finally felt the antsy feeling that means it is time to return. That I needed 30 days to get to that point is a pretty clear indication that I pushed myself too far for too long.

Moving forward, I have developed a loose schedule that delineates work and play time, and has self-care woven into it. I have time for everything, and most importantly I have time for myself. Something I have been historically not so good at doing and something I am striving to improve upon this go around. I have been given a great gift of time; I shall not squander it.

As it is Memorial Day, I hope each of you has a good one and takes a moment to remember those who have given the ultimate sacrifice. Maybe it is a family member, maybe it is a general thanks that you send out. Either way, thankful is a good place to inhabit.

Onward.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

I DO.

I can't begin to share all of the videos and pictures that have come out of our wedding this past Saturday, but hands down it was an amazing experience. The joy, love and positive energy raised under that full moon in a Northern Vermont field was incredible. 

All you need is LOVE. 


Mulder and Scully keeping watch over the cup cakes.

One of my favorite pictures out of the day. I've never been a fan of those images of the bride looking
down and away, supposedly all shy and demure. Especially when you know nine times out of tem
she was ripping someone a new one five minutes earlier. Be who you are, and be proud of it.




Just of few of my dance sisters.

My Mum in the dark dress and my Aunt in the light one. My cousin photobombing with a
gigantic freaking beer in the back.

Friday, May 20, 2016

18 Hours.

By this time tomorrow... well it's 6:30am so I'll probably be awake and freaking out.

But at 6:30pm tomorrow evening I will officially be married.


See you on the flip side!

Friday, May 13, 2016

Eight Days

In eight days I will be a married woman.

I am not taking his name. Really, I've spent the last 42 years inhabiting my name... it's a little late to change it now. I'm just going to get a kick out of Best Guy being called Mr. Mylastname.

Screwing with social constructions is a fun time for all!

Buddy Christ, Mulder and Scully all approve of our non-traditional nuptial choices.

Tomorrow I am taking the entire day to do something Triskele Wellness oriented. It's terrible timing since I should be spending the day cleaning out the barn I'm getting married in, but it is a massive marketing opportunity for me. It was too good to pass up, and frankly I'm going to enjoy getting out and thinking about something different for a few hours.

In other good news, on Wednesday we dropped Toby off at the doggie daycare we used to use for Buddy. We were expecting the worst but he did very well there. We think he may have been there before with his other Momma because he was comfortable and went with the employees and was generally a Good Dog all around. This makes us very happy because now we don't have to feel guilty about boarding him for the wedding. Since barking is also (still) a real issue for walks and friends in the house, we may be using it for band practice nights too. We haven't heard back from the trainer we got in touch with, but we still plan on moving forward with that. We can't have him barking and lunging at people with strollers. Unacceptable.

In the mean time, I have been buying up all the alcohol within a 20 mile radius.


Thank god for Costco, is all I'm saying. At this point we both feel like we have enough beer, but not enough non-alcoholic or wine beverages. So I'm going back out today. On Sunday we're planning on bringing a lot of this pile up to the barn and also giving it another good cleaning. T-dog will enjoy a day of doggie daycare while this happens.

I must admit, I am bored with wedding logistics. I just want to be married already. I know it's coming, and the next week will speed by with a crazy amount of speed.

But I just want to be married to this awesome goober. RIGHTNOW.
Yo.



Tuesday, May 10, 2016

You Should Get Used to Me Talking About the Wedding. A LOT.

Eleven days from today, I will be a married woman.

Yikes.

However there is is:


The wedding dress of my dreams, thanks to my fellow dance sister and seamstress extraordinaire. She hit it out of the ballpark. When I tried it on for the final fitting, I didn't want to take it off. It is exactly what I wanted. I wouldn't have been able to find anything like it anywhere in the Universe; custom was the only way. I am so glad I went this route. We're saving our pennies so many other ways.... the only thing we're spending significant money on is the caterer. But this. It's my wedding day. I'm gonna have my dress.

In other news, Sunday was Mother's Day. Best Guy wished me a happy Fur Baby Mother's Day. It was the first time anyone's said Happy Mother's Day to me. I feel very much like a mother these days. Spending so much time at home with Toby, it is like trying to figure out what a toddler who hasn't quite mastered words is trying to tell you. Yesterday when I went to pick up my dress, I had no choice but to leave him home alone for a few hours. We have a good set up for him, and we both believe that it is better to get him into the habit of us leaving now than to dote on his separation anxiety and then suffer the consequences later on.

The beagle in him loves a good walk in the wood. So much to smell!

Leaving him just about broke my heart. He knew what was going on and threw a doggie "don't leave me" fit, and I spent the entire time I was gone sad and worried. Tomorrow we are dropping him off at Doggie Daycare, since I will again have to be gone for a few hours and we'll need to get him used to the place for the wedding and minimoon. All I can think of is that he'll think we're abandoning him. I asked BG if he could do it since I would end up bawling my eyes out for an hour after dropping him off, then feel so guilty that I change my mind and pick him back up.

I have spent most of my adult life not having pets, mainly due to lease restrictions or the fact I was traveling a lot, or simply lack of funds to support any. Now that I have two kitties and a pooch and spend my time refereeing the lot, I am in seventh heaven. I love my fur babies and freely admit I am the spoiler of the family. They fill my heart and I adore them.

Even when they are being little shits.

...speaking of little shits who like to goad their new
baby brother into going after them...


Monday, May 2, 2016

Tangents. Get Your Random Tangents. Three for the Price of One!

I've had lots of disparate thoughts running through my head the last week or so. This may get kind of jumbled.

1. I am so, so sick of all things bridal. Not our wedding - I'm super excited for that. But bridal stuff in general... hurk. For a long time I was super into Offbeat Bride, because at least it wasn't all frothy and white. But I'm at the point where it feels like even they are just part of the larger Wedding Conglomerate. I never thought that I would be the one so anti-wedding, because I do love glamming myself up in pretties and sparklies. But for some reason it's getting to me. And we're having a super fun, non-traditional, relaxed affair and it has been 98% drama free. I mean.... how much luckier can a person planning such things be?

I was never the kind of girl to plan my wedding. I played dress up all the time, but weddings? Never that I can remember. But I gotta tell you, I've gotten so sick of pictures of women in wedding dresses trying to look shy and demure, and equally as sick of each "This will blow your mind!" post. I mean come on, you are not the only person to think of a Harry Potter wedding. Sorry.

Here ends my wedding rant. Thank you for listening.

2. My last day at my spa job was on Saturday. On the one hand, it feels really, really good to know that I can devote more time to developing my personal practice. On the other hand, because Toby is still suffering from some attachment issues and, as we discovered this weekend, has not been socialized either with other people or dogs, keenly feeling the inability to leave the house. Toby is not yet at the point where we can leave him alone for any kind of stretch, and Best Guy can't be working from home anymore unless he has a good reason. So this means most of the training is now on me.

I have never fucking trained a dog in my life.

Don't get me wrong... I want him to succeed and be happy and healthy with us. But I am also looking ahead and wondering how I will: go to the office to do work for my business; take my car to get the oil changed; go get a massage on my birthday; leave the house to go to the grocery store or do chores; leave the house for a mid-day yoga class. I can't even bring him for walks on the bike path because he barks at every person who goes by.

Until we get him trained to not bark at people and to be comfortable being alone for any kind of stretch, I'm pretty much stuck at home from 7:50 to 4:45 with no relief. Anyone who says I'm not a stay-at-home parent right now is going to get socked in the teeth. I've already gotten into the wine that was supposed to be for the wedding. I regret nothing.

The only way out is through. Which means we are taking that dog out and about
and living our lives. Because in the long run, that's better for everyone. Damn, we're a cute family. 

3. I have to keep reminding myself that I did not quit the spa job without another job lined up. Just the opposite! I am employed. I am self-employed. Which is exciting and scary. I had a slight break down last week in regards to taxes. Luckily a friend was able to talk me off the cliff, but I still have a way to go before I feel comfortable with that aspect of things. People keep telling me to hire an accountant. Which would be great if my business could afford that. I'm stoked I was able to pay rent this month from the business account. There is no money for an accountant right now. Believe me, if I could pay someone else to do this for me I would.

Still, I am very much looking forward to growing my private practice. I am excited to be able to do the treatments that speak to me, that help me help others the best. I've done a couple of my integrated treatments already (combining Reiki/Energy Work and Massage) and they've been phenomenal experiences. I can't wait to do more!

So I guess that's it. I'm pretty much a ball of anxiety these days.

A primal scream or twelve would do me good. But I think it would scare the neighbors.

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