That is right. I braved the online forms. I yelled at the online forms. I panicked over the online forms. I yelled at Best Guy through the computer who was pushing me to finish the online forms.
I did it.
When I was going through massage school, part of the curriculum was coming up with a business plan. I suffered through that for the first half of the program, dealing with the frustration, anxiety and anger each time I had to work on it. Finally, I realized that this wasn't working for me and my teachers allowed me to switch to a career plan instead.
Going out on my own like this is not something I ever thought I would do, and never planned on doing it. I was going to be successful in working for others. I didn't have a problem with doing so, and it allowed me the freedom from responsibility.
I feel like, for so much of my life, I was always the responsible one. I was the person to do the things that needed to be done when no one else wanted to do them. I always did what I was told, and I did not do the things I was not supposed to do. I always did The Right Thing. The problem with always doing the right thing, however, is that it leaves very little room for risk. Because risk is Not Right. Risk puts you in jeopardy of not being able to fulfill your responsibilities. Risk could mean that you FAIL.
And as I've stated many times in this blog, for me historically, failure is not an option.
So... I may fail terrifically at this. But I don't think I will. I think this is the step I was meant to take. I think it will take time, but my new business will succeed and thrive. I will help people. I will make a difference. And - for the first time - I'll be able to do it on my terms.
Look at me, Dad, I'm an entrepreneur.