Sunday, September 27, 2015

Project 251: The Journey Continues

On Saturday Best Guy and I went up to visit my brother. He has graciously allowed me to entertain the idea of having the wedding at his place, so we went up yesterday to check things out.
I am not above making my guest trample through a field if the views are like this.

Between the gorgeous views (he promises to mow) and the awesome barn he's got we're pretty sure we can make something awesome happen there by the time the wedding comes around. Plus there are huge lilac trees all over the property and they'll be in bloom. hashtag free decor.

Since we were traveling an hour north, we decided to knock off a few 251 locales while we were at it. And now... our latest installment of: Best Guy and Kate Make Fools of Themselves in Public Places:

Literally across the street from my brother's house. They took our pic. I wanted to do something
 funky like a backbend but it was a Veteran's Memorial so.... not so much. 

We took two pictures in Sheldon in order to fulfill my brother's artistic vision regarding this sign.

We are standing in front of a tin cow (just below the Fairfield sign). There may be a picture of me kissing it.

There is apparently a long and involved reason why there is a St Albans Town...

... and a St Albans City. But it goes in to economic politics and I'd just rather get on with my day.

And there you have it! 18 down, 233 to go!

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Control Freaks of the World Unite! In an Orderly Fashion! Along that Wall Over There! According to Height!

I have made no qualms about the fact that I am a control freak. It ranges from "totally cool and No Big Deal" on my best days to "I'm going to spend 30 minutes freaking out over a window blind" on my worst.

Not that the last one has ever happened.


Shuffle feet look at the ground mutter incoherently under your breath.

Thank god I was alone at the time and there was no one to see me at that less-than-stellar moment.

I don't always have to be in charge. In fact, a lot of times there is nothing I like better than to give someone the reigns, walk away, come back a few days later and enjoy the fruits of their labor. However, when you are planning your own wedding on a very strict budget that is not an option.

Best Guy and I are going to be coordinating everything, and a lot of this is going to be DIY. Including, possibly, the catering. Yes, we have the better part of nine months to plan this. Yes, we could probably pull it all together in two weeks and have an awesome shindig. Yes, I had to change most of those pronouns from I to we.

Sorry BG. Love you!

But since this blog is from my perspective, I reserve the right to use the Royal I. That's a thing, isn't it?

I don't have to do this all myself, and I won't. The thing is, I won't know where and when it's time for help until I do all of the preliminary research, coordinating, number crunching, and organizing.

All of this sounds like excuses. Like apologies for how I'm relating to this huge, monumental change in my life. They aren't. I'm not apologizing for my love of planning and organizing. It gets shit done. Yes, everything will be okay and fabulous in the end. One way or the other. It's the family and friends sharing the moment that matters most.

But both BG and I have ideas about what we want to experience, and how we want to share this day with our loved ones. Which means, planning.

So yes. I will most likely freak out in the short term over things that mean nothing in the long term. I will always apologize to the appropriate parties after I calm down. Yes, I will drive everyone nuts with my focus on the minutae of things that ultimately won't matter. I will surface and see the humor in it eventually.

I will not ever apologize for being a planner and organizer. I am who I am, and I can't not be this way. I've tried. Denying who you are is always painful and I refuse to partake any longer. I embrace the crazy wonderful ways that I get things when it feels like I'm herding cats. I will do my best to infuse compassion and understanding in my undertakings. Because we're all just people trying to get along.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go re-arrange my Pinterest wedding boards.

Sunday, September 20, 2015

The Apocalypse Has Come (and it has a Color Theme)

Best Guy proposed Tuesday night. It is Sunday morning. Since then, I have:

  • Purloined an old copy of Vermont Brides from my work (it was in the break room so fair game)
  • Purchased the most recent copy of Vermont Brides
  • Started a wedding book
  • Narrowed down a venue
  • Narrowed down a date
  • Started two Pinterest boards
  • Started filling the aforementioned book/pinterest boards with ideas
  • Started designing the layout of one of the venues
  • Started researching non-traditional ceremony ideas
  • Started researching the feasibility of self-catering 
  • Looked up the next date of the local Bridal Expo (November! Boo-ya freebies!)
  • Drove my brother crazy with my questions so now he's ignoring me
Kind of jumping the gun a little bit considering that we're looking at early June for a wedding date. We would love to do it sooner (like, tomorrow) but we want to hold it outside if possible and in Vermont, that isn't possible November through April. Even May can be iffy. 

Even though I've been deep into party planning mode, the reality is that both Best Guy and I are very anti-Wedding Establishment. Also, as a lackadaisical Pagan (me) and an agnostic Jew (him), pretty much all religious traditions are out the window. We believe that the $30,000 "average" currently being spent in the United States on weddings is farking ridiculous. We are both determined to put on a great party for significantly less.

Why buy a froo-froo $50 pastel wedding binder full of crap you won't need when
you can buy a $10 journal, $6 markers and $3 post-it notes? Things like time-lines
and to-do lists? Print out free of the internets. BAM.

We are certain we can plan a wedding and reception for less than $5,000. In fact, BG would prefer to keep it to $3,500 (the low end of our budget window), and as game as I am to try and shoot for that I'm not sure how feasible it is. We don't plan on cutting corners; far from it. We are simply certain that we can have everything we want out of this shindig without going broke. 

We are determined to make this event uniquely our own, and have fun in the process. Plus, I hear there is a cake tasting somewhere in all of this....

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Good News Everyone!

Ahem. For the Futurama fans.

If you read my last post, you'll remember that September 15th was our first dating anniversary.

Dawwwwwwww. We were gooberously sweet.

It got even worse after Best Guy proposed and I said yes.

(wait for bomb drop)

What what??????

That's right. The girl who never thought she would get married is now in the beginning stages of planning a wedding. That's right, Control Freak Herself gets to plan a wedding.



My engagement ring. You know what's weird? Wearing an engagement ring.

Not that I'm excited about it or anything.

I'm sure in the coming months I will share more with you about this than you care to experience. But for now, I will leave it to share with you how gloriously happy we both are.

Wedding (!!!!!!)

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Happy One

I met Best Guy online. Before we met in person, we spent a fair amount of time messaging back and forth on the Dating Site. I asked him how he came up with such an original band name, and his reply was "meet me for a drink and I'll tell you."

I thought he had some chutzpah so I agreed to meet him for a drink at a local cidery. Because we have those in Vermont. We have a lot of those in Vermont. I think we've become the unofficial artisanal hard cider capital of the world.


That was one year ago today. Exactly 365 days ago we met for the first time, sampled a flight of ciders, ate cheese and crackers, and delighted over pub fries. We talked. And talked. And talked.

We have pretty much sampled the gamut this past year: love, loss, new jobs, moving, home renovation, travel... you name it, all of the things that "test" a relationship were thrown at us. And we held on to each other and kept going. One of us may have been laughing hysterically while the other made weird noises. 

My life has been made immeasurably better by the presence of Best Guy. My love for him grows more each day, each minute, each second.

My heart is full,

I love you, Sweet Baboo.

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Keep On Keepin' On

The last seven days of been a whirlwind of crazy emotions, and this coming weekend for me will be every bit as busy (although not at all emotionally horrific). I am spending this week preparing for the weekend, where I will:

  • Teach my first-ever belly dance class
  • perform 2 hours of spot massage for a local church doing a "spa night"
  • perform the Raindrop Technique for a dear friend
So, to prepare I am loading and developing a playlist for the class, remembering how to dance in a Cabaret style (I've been doing more Tribal Fusion this past year or two), gathering enough massage equipment to last two hours, and, oh yeah, teaching myself how to do the Raindrop Technique.
Yeah.... not a Cabaret piece...
In addition to all of this busyness, I am also preparing for my one-year anniversary with Best Guy, just six days from now. 

Taken on maybe our fourth or fifth date. Goobers Forever!
In addition in addition, I have finally made the decision to start my own private practice. Everyone I have confided this to has expressed something along the lines of "it's about time!" I am in still early days yet, having come to this conclusion just last Thursday, before the Buddy poo hit the fan. I am giving myself an official start-time of January 2016, but the reality is I will probably be unofficially practicing before then.

Crazy September Days, yo. 

Thursday, September 3, 2015

Dearest Buddy

It is with a very heavy heart that I write this. We took Buddy to the vet this morning to get an X-ray. It showed that he has a stomach tumor which has grown so much that it ruptured a bit of his intestines. The bloat that we've been worrying over is a result of the rupture: gasses and possibly liquids leaking into his abdomen.

Due to his age and poor health, anesthesia and thus surgery is not recommended.

Best Guy is on his way home from the vet now, with the Budster. We've taken tomorrow off and plan on showing him the best 24 hours he's ever had. At least, as much as he's willing to experience.

We are both heartbroken, but we don't want him suffering. We know this is the best choice for us all.

Even though he's only been in my life for a short time, he takes up a very large portion of my heart.

He's a Good Dog.

He's a very Good Dog.

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Insanity: Doing the Same Thing Over and Over and Expecting Different Results

Both we and our next door neighbor have large crab apple trees in our front yards. Odds are very good they were planted at the same time, as they are about the same size. I wouldn't be surprised if they went in the same year our homes went up (1969).

For the last couple weeks, I have watched as my neighbor goes out and picks the tiny apples off the lawn and side walk. I couldn't figure out what she was doing. Was she trying to keep the sidewalk clean? Was she harvesting them for canning purposes? I was intrigued.

Over the weekend, Best Guy and I were walking Buddy one afternoon when we came upon her once again out there with a small bucket picking up the fallen fruit. We exchanged our pleasantries, remarked on how full the trees were with apples, and then she dropped "I hate this tree!" on us. We didn't really have much to say to that, so we made our good byes and went on our way.

This morning I saw her out there with her bucket, once again fighting a losing battle with a tree she can't stand. Every day, she's out there. Picking up tiny, sour apples.

Every day.

As I see it, there is a very simple solution to her problem. Yet for reasons I am not privy to, she instead chooses to fight a house fire with a thimble full of water. Perhaps her husband planted and loved it, and she keeps it out of sentiment. Maybe she doesn't have the funds to have it professionally removed.

Or maybe she just isn't seeing the most obvious solution.

Isn't that the way? Something seems insurmountable to us, so instead of taking a course of action that would solve the issue, we instead develop habits to let us think we're somehow managing the situation. To the outside observer, our excuses and habits seem downright ridiculous yet they make perfect sense to us. When someone remarks that "if you did {this} you wouldn't have to deal with {that} anymore", we become offended. Because we can't do {this}.


Self-imposed limitations work far better at keeping us in line than almost anything else. Recognizing and dealing with them is some of the most painful work you'll do. Because realizing you have no one to blame but yourself for all these things you could have been doing if only... is a hard pill to swallow.

I love it when lessons come out of the blue and whack you on the head, don't you?

Better Kate Than Never

As you've probably noticed (all six of you), over the last few months my contribution to this blog has dwindled significantly. In trying...