Sparky People Week One

Well, I've been officially on SparkPeople for one week as of today. I have lost 3 pounds.

I've got to say, so far I am liking this program. I can be as joiny or a-social as I like (surprise surprise I have chosen to go a-social on this), and they have some decent articles and ideas. You can use their meal plans or eat your own food. You can also tailor your daily inspirations to be uniquely yours: your wording, your goals, your needs. They don't yell at you or turn things red when you go over your daily goals or don't meet them at all. It's as chill as you need or want it to be.

This is usually the point when I get all cocky and think to myself "oh, look at all I just did and now I can sit back and watch the rest slide off" and then end up gaining it all back. So this is where I'm going to have to hunker down and keep on keepin' on.

One thing I didn't expect (although I have no idea why I thought I'd be the exception to the rule) was all of these damned emotions that are coming to the surface. Honestly, I think they are part of the reason I'd get through one week and then stop. I'm releasing the living quarters of all these old feels and in doing so I get to revisit them all one last time before they move out for good. Frankly, it is usually just easier to stuff them back down with food.

Not this time, yo.

I'm sitting with them. I'm sitting through them. I'm swearing at them to get the fuck gone already 'cause I'm sick of this shit. It isn't pretty, but here I am, going through it because I know it is something that needs doing and releasing old holding patterns and letting go is good and blah blah blah.

HOLY ANXIETY BATMAN.

Moving on, dealing with it, getting through it, on to the next thing.

Because that's life. And if you don't deal with it, you're just carrying that shit around with you. And let me tell you, that shit gets heavy after a while.


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