Showing posts from July, 2014

The Food Experiment

Following up on this post, after keeping track of my food intake for a couple weeks I learned a few things when I leave my eating unchecked:

I spike different groups of food: I'll eat tons of veggies for two days running, then eat virtually none the next couple days but eat a ton of protein, etc. I think over the course of the week it balances out, but my daily intake is very unbalanced.I eat what I consider too many highly processed items (I also realize that I am still probably way below the National average).When left to my own devices, I tend to eat four meals day.I've always been jealous of people who "forget" to eat because I always remember food. Turns out, I'll forget to eat breakfast on a regular basis. I often go way too long between lunch and dinner (8 hours), which is also my work time. I end up doing my final massages with little to no fuel and then gorge when I get home. This week, I've got a food plan I'm following and next week I'll tak…

It's All About Perception

Yesterday was an amazing summer Sunday. It was the kind of day you wish would last forever and lives on in your memory as a Good Day. It was the kind of day to cherish. I spent the majority of it in nature with good friends, and a minority of it inside with good friends. But the whole of it was Good.

One of my conversations yesterday left me pondering the idea of perception. What I had taken to be an absolute truth of a situation was in direct opposition to what a friend of mine knew to be absolutely true. It wasn't anything bad - quite the opposite - just two very different experiences of the same thing.

Which led me to ponder... how much of our perception is actually projection? How much of my "truth" was actually me projecting my fears and issues all over the damned place, painting a picture that had no basis in reality?

I won't go so far as to invalidate my experience of the situation, because if I was projecting, it was because I felt I needed to protect myself …

These Hips Don't Lie

I am no longer able to eat like I did when I was 20. Or 30.


For the most part I am pretty accepting of my body... as much as any woman in a Western culture can be these days. However, I'm carrying around a little too much of me and no matter what or how I try I just can't seem to get rid of it. I don't want to lose a lot; I've come to the conclusion that I'll never see my lowest weight again and I'm okay with that. 5 pounds. That's all. And they will. not. budge.

So, I am keeping a food diary. I'm being extremely honest. I'm not trying to eat better to skew the results. I want to see what I'm eating, how I'm eating, when I'm eating, and perhaps target some of the issues.

I've already come to the conclusion that I can no longer eat Ricotta cheese. I've been ignoring the issue for a couple years now, but it is officially on the "if I eat it stand far, far away from me" list.

Double pout. Because LASAGNA.

I'm dra…

Asanas Outside

I met up with my dear friend Jennifer today to take some pictures of me doing yoga outside. This has been something I've wanted to do for a while, but it's really hard to take yoga pictures of yourself because the timer usually goes off just as you are either halfway in the pose, or losing balance out of it because you got into it too fast. These pictures will come in handy if I ever get going as a teacher. Enjoy!

Sometimes There is No Going Back

This past week has been an extremely lean week for me financially. Next week will be much better (thank you, Universe!!!) but when I went grocery shopping on Monday I found myself in a bit of a quandry. Most of my pantry has been depleted at this point and there was no way I could afford to buy organic. I would also have virtually no time to make myself healthy meals. I'm pulling a 6-day week this week and I have been fully booked for all of my shifts. NOT COMPLAINING! It's just that when you're getting home at 8p or later after a full shift of massages, cooking is just not on the plate. Hell, standing is not on the plate.

So I did something I haven't done in years. I went to the conventional freezer section and got some Healthy Choice frozen meals that were on a twofer sale.


Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, and when you're at the terrible place of no money and no time you have to make allowances for yourself.

There was a time many, many years ago wh…

Sorry/Not Sorry

"I'm Sorry."

When you've been hurt, inconvenienced, otherwise wronged by someone, those are the words you want to hear most. They are an acknowledgement from the other individual that they did something that was unkind to you and they regret their actions. When used correctly and sincerely, those simple words can have a profoundly deep impact on everyone involved. They can be a catharsis.

I have noticed that in my own speaking, I am often using these words for something other than the intended use. I'll apologize when a friend tells me they are having a bad day. If someone I know suddenly finds themselves grieving, my first response is "Oh, I am so sorry for your loss."

Am I the one responsible for my friend's bad day, or the loss of a loved one? I hope the hell I'm not!

When I say "I'm sorry you're having a bad day" what I mean is "I acknowledge your tough situation as I have experienced something similar and it is not en…

Open Heart, Insert World

There is a belief in yoga that we - each and every plant, animal, human, and funky-ass thing living at the bottom of the ocean - is connected through our Self. Not our "self": that bit of ego that tells us that we are an individual. Rather our Self: that bit of the Divine (however you perceive it) that lives in each of us. Maybe you call it the Soul. It is that bit of Eternity that returns to the Mother Ship once we are done with the container in which we currently reside.

The Western world places great emphasis on the self. We appreciate individuality (so long as we're all the same, individually). We appreciate independence. We appreciate self-sufficiency. We do not understand giving without any thought of receiving. We do not comprehend serving for the sake of serving. If someone does something for nothing, we think them the fool. It never occurs to us that it is the exact opposite of nothing that they are receiving... that just because their reward is intangible that …

I Got $20 in my Pocket... Oh, Wait. No, I Don't.

I just paid my July 1st bills.


It was a good thing I had some money in my savings account to transfer over, because there was no way I had enough in my checking to cover all that was due.

Damned car insurance, fucking things up.

I do my very best to live within my means. Are there places I could cut back? Most definitely. But generally speaking I usually squeak by. But an insanely slow Spring at work means I simply have not been bringing in enough money.

It's looking like things are starting to pick back up at work so I am hopeful that the downward slump is over. I seldom worry about money, but I've got to say I don't think I have ever seen my account that low in my life.

It is scary, yo.