Sunday, April 28, 2013

Something... more...

Yesterday I attended a 3-hour workshop on dance meditation. It was a beautiful spring day and we raised some wonderful energy. Some of the meditations have stuck with me, and I look forward to integrating them into my practice. Sure, meditation as defined by yoga is generally the seated pose most people are familiar with, but it is far from the only way to do so.

This was the "Fire Hands" Meditation; we're all holding tea candles (unlit due to fire hazard requirements). I'd have left my hands in, but there were other people in the picture and my editing software stinks.
Something really burst forward in me yesterday... a yearning to let my inner Celtic Warrior Goddess out. It's been bubbling underneath the surface for close to a month now (ever since the salt cave, to be honest) but yesterday really brought it to the foreground. Most of my interests and practices are innately feminine and/or yin. *I* am innately feminine. I say that with pride. I'm not a girly girl, but I am female and I enjoy being a female. But as the yin/yang symbol indicates, there's a little yang in every yin and a little yin in every yang.

My yang wants out.

That sounds so dirty.

Hee hee hee.

So anyway. I'm putting it out into the Universe that this is something I want to explore further. I don't know what form it will take. Martial arts? Archery? Riflery? Is that a word? I find truth in the saying that the right teacher comes in the right time, so it will be interesting to see how this manifests in my life. I must say, I'm looking forward to finding out.

If I could be a Jedi, that would rock.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Hey Y'all.

Time flies and the next thing you know it's been like a week and a half since I had anything to say. Which is not actually true. I had plenty of things to say (always do), but I was pretty sure you didn't want to hear any of it. Nothing like a day of two of self-pitying wallowing to make you sick of yourself.

Yesterday was another 70 degree day (two in the space of two weeks!). I spent a lot of it outside, either taking a walk or just hanging out on my porch. Got in a Yin Yoga class, which I am falling in love with. Yin Yoga, if you don't know, is a very gentle yoga that focuses on stretching the ligaments and attachments more so than the muscles to allow for deep release and relaxation. There is very little muscular effort, and you hold the poses from 3 to 5 minutes. I'm not talking about the pretzel poses. All the poses we do are seated or laying down. You can make it as intense or as gentle as you like, but the goal is to do as little work as possible and basically let your own body and gravity take care of matters.

I like it because I feel like I'm regaining some of my lost flexibility. The first time I tried it, we went into a pose that historically gives me a lot of trouble because of my tight IT bands on the sides of my legs. By the end of the 5 minutes, I had let go of all of my holding patterns and was in a position I never thought was anatomically possible. It was pretty cool!  It was also pretty intense, but it showed me just how much I needed to let go. I'd post a picture, but frankly I just got up and I'm in my pj's and haven't combed my hair yet, so that's not going to happen. So here's a picture of a Dogwood (is it that?) and some daffodils in bloom instead.

Spring!!! Friggin' Finally!

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Boston

I'll say it straight out... Boston is not my favorite city on the East Coast. I prefer New York. Always have, always will. I root for the Boston sports teams in my own nonchalant way of course; what card carrying New Englander doesn't? But Boston has never called to me the way NYC has. I can't explain why.

That being said, I think everyone can agree that what happened yesterday afternoon was heart-wrenching. I was (and am) deeply saddened by the pain and sorrow of innocent bystanders whose only crime that day was hard work, dedication, and having supportive loved ones cheering them on. Moreover, I am saddened by the fact that someone else (or many others) were in such deep pain and anger that this action became a viable choice.

I believe that people can be born inherently saint-like, for lack of a better term. I also believe that they can be born inherently evil. Our world is one of balance; for us to have the one we must have the other. Perhaps those who found this path were just born this way. Perhaps they were crushed beneath their horror and this was the result. Maybe it was a little of both.

Whatever the reason (and we always find the reason, sooner or later. Just as we always find out the "who"), what should remain the focus are the brave people who ran toward instead of away. We should remember those who ran the 26.2 miles then ran straight to the hospital to donate blood. The bystanders on the street there to support their loved ones in the race when the explosions went off. The little boy cheering on his father.

Remember them. Remember Peace. Light and Love are what matter now.

Shanti Shanti Shanti. Peace peace peace.


Thursday, April 11, 2013

Sorry for not Posting!

I just realized that it's been a while since I wrote anything.

Oopsie!

"Quiet time" at work has officially begun this week. As in, I have yet to go into work this week. I am choosing to worry about finances next week. Right now, I'm so grateful for the time off I don't really care that I probably won't get a paycheck next week.

I'm pretty sure I'll care next week.

I did my taxes on Monday, so my paltry returns should come in just as I start getting desperate. I've got some cash I've been purposely saving for this event, so there is a Costco trip in my near future. I've also been stocking up on healthy noms like beans and lentils so I should be okay at least food-wise. And as we all know how obsessed I get with food, this is a good thing.

I also booked a plane ticket to NYC in May so I can go visit my friends. I am looking forward to this! It's my first vacation since August and it is needed. Of course, this "found" week has done me a world of good. I am feeling much better. Much - dare I say perkier - than I have in a while.

The weather is still shite. It's April 11th and the high for today is 38. Threefrakkingeight. Oy. Luckily it's only going to last for a couple days. There's a big storm coming in (it's the one that dumped on Denver the other day) and we're going to get snow/sleet/freezing rain tonight into tomorrow.

Spring? Spring? Wherefore art thou Spring? I'd like to put away my flannel pj's some time before June.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Oy.

As much fun as Girl's Night In was, little did I know a three-day depression bender was on the other side of it.

Ugh.

It occurred to me at some point that maybe trying to let go wasn't necessarily the right thing to do. 'Cause you know how it is when you try not to think of something... suddenly everything reminds you of that one thing. The more you try not to notice, the more it grabs you by the throat and screams LOOK AT ME ALREADY!

So maybe it's time to let go of letting go. Maybe by just being - not trying to ignore it but not feeding it either - but by just being with it, eventually it will let go of me. Eventually it will just naturally stay in the past when I move forward. If I give it nothing to cling to, how can it remain?

So, maybe I'm Debbie Downer. I guess that's just who I need to be right now. I won't be her forever. As the guy said, this too shall pass. I just need to let it happen.

So.... You Want to be an Artist.

For the last several weeks, I have been working through The Artist's Way . This book has been out since the 1990's and I've been...