Wednesday, June 13, 2012


For the past several days now, I have been feeling down in the dumps. All I want to do is hide in my li'l Hobbit Hole (aka my apartment) and let the world pass me by while I deal with whatever this is. Because I don't know what this is, or where it came from. Or if it's even mine. Because I don't think it is. But it has latched on and won't let go.

So here I am, trying to do the Right Thing and avoid humanity and humanity keeps reaching in and trying to draw me out. Which leads me to believe that Humanity is masochistic. I mean, one might look at it as "you need to get out and be with people" but honestly, that is going against everything my Self is telling me. Unfortunately, bills need to be paid and food needs to be bought, so work is something I must do. In the mean time, I'm just trying to do my best and not take my foul mood out on innocent bystanders. Thankfully, today is my Friday. Which means, as soon as I get home from work I can hole up for the next couple days and take care of my Self.

Deep down, I'm thinking this might be the shit before the rose, so to speak. I need to deal with and let go of something before something New and Good can come in. Which means that it is indeed mine. Or maybe I'm dealing with something that is mine and something that isn't, but found something to feed on and now everything's compounded. Because before Sunday, I was in a pretty damn good mood.


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