Showing posts from September, 2011

Book I'm Reading

I wanted to let you all know what I've been working on/reading lately. Hopefully I'll get around to posting a review to this book, but right now I'm only doing a chapter a day so it might be a while.

I got in Border's going-out-of-business book sale for like $5, but it looks like Amazon has it fairly cheap, and even free if you have a Kindle or want to download it electronically. There is also a supporting website that you can browse here if you like.
I wanted to let you all know about this book now instead of when I finished it, just in case there was anyone out there who is struggling to lose weight that just will not budge, no matter what you try. There may be some underlying issues you need to deal with first.
Personally, I am using the book to help bring my relationship with food back into the "healthy" status. I'm still having issues with bingeing (although big bags of chips are now forbidden in my apartment) and so far this book has really opened up m…


After Facebook's latest round of updates, I decided that I needed to expand my social networking horizons. So, myself along with several other friends migrated over to Google+.

I'm waiting for it to not suck.

I can see its possibilities, but frankly it's not particularly user-friendly at the moment. I'm having issues finding people, and short of exporting all my contacts from Yahoo into another file and then somehow getting G+ to read it, getting my friends back is going to take a while. Also, I think a lot of the people actually want to follow aren't over there yet. I'd send invites, but.... back to the whole Yahoo issue.

Of course, when FB first started it sucked too. Then it got really good and then it started pulling a George Lucas and fixing things that weren't broke.

So, I guess I should give it some time. Meanwhile, I'm updating both now and am waiting to see which takes off and which peters out.

I'd Have Gotten Away with it too...

... if it weren't for you meddling kids.

I have been having a lot of unsettling dreams the past couple months. Not nightmares, but dreams that are most definitely not fun-time romps in the woods. They've been waking me up and ungodly hours of the morning (ie, any time before 8am) and have been leaving me out of sorts for a large portion of the day. Many of them feel real enough that feelings of guilt linger long after they should.

You see, in my dreams I'm killing people.

I have had these dreams on at least three separate occasions that I remember. Once I killed someone while driving in my car and attempted to cover it up, and twice I've killed clients at work. The first dream was so deep and insidious that I'd nearly convinced myself it had actually happened. The most recent dream woke me up this morning at 5am. A scant five hours sleep and I'm still trying to convince myself not to feel guilty over something that didn't happen.

So I finally got online in …

I'm not ignoring you...


For some reason time has gotten away from me. I had no idea it had been a week since I last posted.

Last weekend was crazy busy for me. I had a performance in a town 2 solid hours south of us. Got to see some of the massive Irene damage on the way. Scary to think that the road we were driving on actually didn't exist for like a week.

Also ended up driving past the restaurant where the ex took me for my birthday. The good news is, it didn't get washed away by Irene. The bad news is, I wasn't expecting it and driving through that whole town gave me a bit of a lurch. Good memories, baaaaaad outcome. The show itself was good. Not too many people attended it, as it was competing with a beautiful late summer evening and the local county fair. All of the other dancers made for a very enthusiastic audience though! :-)

All this was on Saturday. On Sunday, I headed up to Dreaming Mountain in Johnson for Johnson State College's Integrated Health Day. A whole bunch of a…

Yumbly in my Tumbly

Back when I was still doing Weight Watchers – almost ten years ago now – I frequently read posts on the message boards for those who had 200 pounds or more to lose. I didn’t have nearly that much (I ended up losing 30 or so), but they had some fascinating stories and their trials and tribulations helped put many things in perspective for me.

One of the things people would occasionally post was how – for the first time in their lives – they felt hungry. Because they spent so much time always eating, they’d never let their bodies get to the point where hunger kicked in. It was a whole new way to relate to their bodies.
Several years later, Weight Watchers developed a program that could be done instead of their point-counting system. It was based more on whole foods and instead of counting points, you paid more attention to your hunger cues, eating before you became ravenous and stopping before you felt stuffed. People who needed the accountability preferred the points system, while those …

Going Back

While I was going to school for massage, part of the requirement for graduation was to develop a business plan. I think this is par for the course for any school who claims graduates can sit for the national tests - it's a minimum requirement of the national associations.

Anyway, while I was in school I was fresh off Hell Job, and the business plan gave me a hell of a time. I was angry at it. The idea of sitting down and writing it - and especially thinking about all of the marketing -  filled me with resentment and a real bad case of the "I don't wannas". Which is not how it should be. It should be an exciting thing... you're thinking about the future after all. What grand possibilities are in store for you? What can you make of yourself?

Granted, the process sort of takes the fun out of the "what if" part by focusing on financials and minutae of reality, but that's the business world for you. Take something fun and then keep staring at it until th…


Why does OKCupid keep trying to match me up with guys who rock a 70's porn 'stache?

Seriously... did I accidently check something that said "love the snot catcher, please match appropriately"?


Men, if you're reading this, the ladies do NOT like the porn 'stache. We laugh at the porn 'stache. We write derogatory blog posts about the porn 'stache, hoping that the embarrassment will force you to shave it off, thus allowing us to meet you instead of the scary thing under your nose.



On This Day in 2009

Every once in a while, if you look at one of your Facebook sidebars, they have this thing where they bring up old statuses. Which is actually kinda of creepy if you think too hard about it, but also kinda of cool. For example, on this day in 2009, I posted "I have a new job!"

Which got me to thinking back. On this day in 2009, I did indeed have a new job. My time at Hell Job was literally over by a day. I took just one day off in between jobs (Labor Day), before starting training for my school job.

Which means, two years ago starting next week, I started my journey toward becoming a massage therapist. TWO years ago! Where does the time go? When I first started at my current job, when people asked me how long I'd been doing it, I'd say "oh, about a year." Meaning: Well, I started learning how to give a massage at school in September, and it's September now, so... Now, when I say I've been doing it for a little over a year, I don't have to count m…

I Can't Help It... It's On My Mind

My ex lives in one of the toughest hit parts of the state. From the news feeds I've been reading, his town is pretty much completely cut off. They're struggling to get the people stuck in town the basics like food and medicine.

He lives on the upper floors of his apartment building so I'm guessing he was at least okay. Although, the pavement in front of his place had been undermined earlier in the year from the heavy spring rains and had been pegged for fixing. Who know if it held. His entire parking lot could have been washed away. His step-parents also live very close to a creek and a flat-lying area.

I'm sure they are all fine - from what I understand no one has been seriously injured or killed, so I know they are all at least okay. But I am so disheartened that I am not even "allowed" to text him to see if he and his are okay. That even if I did, he would never respond so the most I would get is... nothing.

I'm sorry. But he introduced me to a bunch o…