Wednesday, March 2, 2011


What is it that makes it so hard to say no? Even when you know it is in your best interest to do so?

I am finishing up a three-day weekend. I asked for an extra day off because I was on the verge of burning out. I was exhausted, my energy levels depleted, and I was not giving good massages. At least, I did not feel as though I was.

A little while ago, work called to see if I could come in an cover someone's shift this evening. I have learned the hard way that having an evening shift followed the next day by a morning shift is disaster for me. I don't have the recovery time I need and I end up doing poorly all week long. I know they wouldn't have called unless they had no other option (and they said as much), but I said no.

I do my best to help out whenever I can. I try to cover shifts for coworkers who need their own break. I try to cover when there is an emergency and they need someone to come in. I try to be accommodating, because I know that if our positions were switched, I would be thankful that someone was willing to help out.

I said no because I needed to say no for me. Because I can't be all things to all people all of the time and not expect it to take a toll. Because it is OKAY to put yourself first every once in a while. You know the old adage - you can't take care of anyone else until you take care of yourself first. And sometimes that means saying no.

And as I'm a people-pleaser and a nurturer, saying no when someone is asking something of me is very difficult. I feel like if I can say yes - as in, no one's dying, I don't have any immediate plans, etc - then I should say yes. But really? That's just setting myself up for burn-out and exhaustion in the best of cases and to be taken advantage of in the worst of situations. I know work wasn't trying to take advantage of me; they aren't like that there.

But I just. Couldn't. Do it. Which is a very good indication that I needed this last day to myself.

And yes, this whole post is basically me trying to convince myself that it was in fact okay to say "no" and to get my three-day weekend.

Thanks for listening. :-)

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