But this post is sort of work related. Well, business related. This semester, we've been focusing a lot more on the business aspect of massage therapy - how to write a business plan, market your business, etc etc.
Initially, when I was looking at the school, this was a huge plus for me. Learning how to write a business plan and essentially having one ready to go was (and remains) a huge positive. If I ever decide to open my own business (massage or not), this would be a valuable tool to have in my toolbox.
The one thing I did not foresee at the time would be how angry this business part would make me. I mean, I truly have a visceral "I don't wanna and you can't make me!" reaction to all of the homework I need to do for this part of school. The idea of pulling together a business plan fills me with dread, and I cannot think of anything I would rather do less than competitor research. I don't want to develop a mission statement, thank you very much. I could care less about a program statement, and drawing together a business schedule draws little but ridicule.
This really all came to a head this past Tuesday. I was sitting in class so petulant about what was being asked of me that it sort of stunned me. I am so anti-business right now it isn't funny. I don't want my "business" to be a business - I want it to be an under-the-table sort of thing that gives me a little pocket change while I work officially for someone else in order to pay the bills.
I have high regards for those willing and able to open their own businesses and make them succeed; at this point in my life I am obviously not one of them. I think I am one of the few people in the class who has spent her whole life up to this point in a business/administrative setting, and I fought like hell to get away from that. The last thing I want to do right now is throw myself back there. I am just not ready or able to do that now.
So for now, I am still doing the business plan. Even though I am fighting it every inch of the way, I can see it for the valuable tool it could someday be. I am not throwing my entire self into this project like others in the class are; my energy is being devoted to other things that will support my future goals more. And for right now, my future goals include finding someone else to pay me and take care of all the business stuff.
I am very much okay with that.